Celebrating Mother’s Day: unexpected joys with my mom-in-law

Mother’s Day was this past Sunday, and it came with its own kind of unexpected beauty. It wasn’t the usual kind of celebration – no big family gathering with my mom, no hugs (this was the most difficult part), no time spent in her presence like we’re used to – because, sadly, she came down with the flu just days before.

Being the ever-thoughtful person she is, she insisted we stay away so the boys wouldn’t catch it. Even while she wasn’t feeling well, she was more worried about everyone else. That’s just who she is. It was strange not seeing her. There’s something about being with your mom on Mother’s Day that just anchors the whole day. But life happens, and health comes first. 

Usually we would spend half the day with my mom and half with mom-in-law, but this year we headed over to my mother-in-law’s for the day. And honestly? Girl delivered! She went above and beyond to make the most beautiful lunch, packed with all the foods us moms love.

It was such a thoughtful gesture – the kind that speaks louder than words. I brought along a pot of akni (because it’s basically tradition at this point), and of course, Big Boy’s favourite meat. He takes his food very seriously, and I wasn't about to risk showing up without it!

Now, let me tell you about Big Boy’s reaction to Mother's Day. Let’s just say he had questions. Mostly about why he didn’t get a gift. He did make me the sweetest card – a real masterpiece complete with a drawing of a braai and the words, “You I love mom.”

My heart melted. I asked him, “But are you a mother?” to which he confidently replied, “No, I’m a brother.” Then, after a second of thinking, he hit me with: “When is Brother’s Day? Because I also want gifts.” I couldn’t help but laugh. Kids are the best kind of chaos.

After the meal, we sat around chatting – and naturally, the past came up. My mother-in-law and I both acknowledged how, just a few years ago, this kind of peaceful, lighthearted day together wouldn’t have seemed possible. We’ve had our rough patches, no denying that. There were times when things felt tense, complicated, maybe even a little hopeless. But here we are now – having grown, healed, and found our way into something that feels steady and real. A mother-and-daughter bond that I honestly never expected to be so strong. Who would have thought we’d come this far?

We cleaned up together, did the dishes (a little milestone of its own), and said our goodbyes with genuine warmth. The day already felt full in the best way – but the real gift came after we got home.

I was just about to kick into mom-mode again when my husband gently suggested something I didn’t even know I needed. He said, “Why don’t you go lie down with baby for a nap? I’ll take Big Boy to the park for a bike ride.” I didn’t argue. I just smiled (maybe cried a little on the inside) and headed straight for the bed.

A peaceful, uninterrupted afternoon nap? On Mother’s Day? That is what I call a spoil. Honestly, I think it’s what every mom secretly dreams of – a moment of stillness, rest, and quiet. And I got it.

So no, this Mother’s Day didn’t go exactly the way I’d planned. But it surprised me with joy in all the places I didn’t expect – through family, healing, laughter, and a really, really good nap. And honestly, that sounds like the perfect way to celebrate motherhood.

tracy-lynn.ruiters@inl.co.za

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